Sunday, October 28, 2012

It's been two years already?

Good Morning, Blog, it has been a while..please forgive me for that, for abandoning, old friend, while life churned and tumbled.  This morning while all was quiet, I felt the urge to seek you out for one of our old talks/purges/a chronical of a bland little life.  That's a good, thing, isn't it?..because this is the first time in two years I've actually felt the urge to write anything except silly status updates on Facebook.

These last few weeks have been crazy.  And right now - since my quiet time has been broken by someone turning on that blasted television - I am considering earplugs.  My quiet little moment has been interrupted again.

Sometimes, it feels like the top of my head will open and I will erupt like a volcano.  There is no peace and quiet, no alone time, no thinking time, since my daughter and her family moved in.  She's unemployed, now, so there's no chance of their finding a place of their own for a very long time.  And while I truly, really, truly want to offer them a place to stay, they're driving me insane.  HE doesn't work and has not in two years.  Come ON!  At least get out there and try to find work. And if they can't move out, maybe they could pay half the light bill, or the water bill, or something - as was agreed upon when they moved in.

And my husband?  He is a lump on the sofa I can't quite smooth out.  Maybe HE could help pay on the utilities.  Or weedeat the yard.  Or turn off the television.

I have a basement.  It's in a state of disrepair right now.  The ceiling tiles need replacing, the walls need washing down and the floors need mopping, but I haven't been able to do that, physically.  Perhaps, though, I could get a ladder down there, pack up all the stuff that's been mildewing and haul it out. replace the ceiling tiles and haul a desk, a sofa, a table, a coffee pot and whatever else I might require and move myself to some place I can hear myself think.

I'm sorry to spout off like this.  And it's not that my life is so bad, but between work - oh, work.  Let me continue my rant/purge.  I was alone this week. Supervisor took off, the transfer coordinator was gone...there were only two of us in our department by Friday.  If it could go wrong, it did.  And also, by Friday, one of our "residents" returned from court with additional time and a release date of 10/29.
I've got nothing to hold him on because the S.O. sent him back without a judgment and commitment.  I spent most of Friday trying to get some documentation and only succeeded in getting a Do Not Release placed on him, and then the head of the auditors called and repeated we have nothing to hold him on.


Well, what am I supposed to do?  I'm not about to release him into the public when he has an additional sentence to serve.  If he goes out into the public and commits a crime, DAC will hang me from the nearest flagpole.  Scapegoat.

I was so sick to my stomach from the week that, when 3:00 rolled around on Friday, I couldn't stay another minute.  I FLED.  I went over the fence, so-to-speak.  I wrote my boss a note, attached emails and phone calls and messages to her computer screen so she can see it on Monday morning - let HER take care of it.  I am the office assistant.  They don't pay me enough to have my stomach tied in knots.

All that said - I know I'm lucky to have a job, a family, a place to stay.  But sometimes, it all gets a little much.

And tomorrow, it's to the dentist for lots of oral surgery.  I plan to be out of commission for at least four days, and if Im lucky, the doc will give me plenty of pain pills.  A little fog would be good, right about now.